What the hell is the matter with me? I have had a very good few days. Yet something is still up with me.

I think I am trying to buy my way out of something, but I can’t figure out what it is. There must be something deep inside that is hurting me or at least taking away my ability to be happy in a very reasonable situtaion.

I keep looking for a quick fix. One that will never fill or fix the problem. Maybe it’s my subconcious attempt to bury whatever it is that is bothering me.

Some soul searching is definately called for. That and some restraint.

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